Me: "What do you mean?"
Sam: "I wanted to be born again but it didn't work."
Me: "Who talked to you about being born again?"
Sam: "You did a long time ago when you read that story from the Bible. But it doesn't work."
Me: "Sam, why did you want to be born again?"
Sam: "So I could go back in time and be little again."
Me: "Sam, I can see why you are confused. When the Bible talks about being born again it doesn't really mean that you become a baby again. They joke about that in the story."
Sam: "What does it mean?"
Me: "It means that your heart becomes brand new again. You become born again when Jesus is in charge of your whole entire life.
(It was at this point that Sam began to sob as his visions of time travel slowly unraveled. I wasn't quite sure how to console him.)
Me: "Would you like for me to read the story from the Bible where it talks about being born again so we can try to figure it out together?"
Behold! The day of salvation is nigh. Just not quite "nigh" enough.