Monday, March 19, 2007

Theological Balderdash Part 2

Submitted definitions by teenagers:

Intinction:
1. To take a cow pie in your sister's face.
2. The breaking and/or effacing of tinker toys.
3. Any harm done to Tinkerbell.
4. Still living, not extinct.
5. To shoot or eat the poop of a cow with a funny look on your face. (Courtesy of middle school boys if you couldn't tell.)

Antinomianism:
1. The study of your mom.
2. The philosophy of complete hatred towards gnomes of all types.
3. The cure for those who shoot and/or eat the poop of a cow with a funny look on their face (once again, thanks to the middle school boys).

Epistemology:
1. It's what happens when Batman loses his garage door opener for the bat cage
2. A study of the reproductive process of flowers.
3. The study of the Episcopalian faith.
4. The study of those who are said "P-Oed."

Supralapsarianism:
1. The study of superheroes eating and/or slurping soup while on the job.
2. A disease where one finds himself believing he is Superman.
3. When you love Superman's tights.

Hamartiology:
1. The ability to harm someone.
2. The idea of using a hammer in every situation.
3. The study of Halmark.
4. The study of those who are obsessed with stealing ham from Genuardi's.

Theophany:
1. The ability to pick your nose at the speed of light.
2. When a symphony plays theological show tunes ("525,600 Bibles").
3. When you know that Steve did something on purpose.

2 comments:

David Drury said...

My favorite: Antinomianism: 1. The study of your mom.

LOL!

Keith Drury said...

Thanks for the reminder of the state of middle school theology ;-) (there WERE teen weren't they???)